Tag Archive | dating

Falling asleep during the movie invalidates your perspective

It was Friday night. My girlfriend, Ashley, and I were lounging at home. “Is it my turn to pick out a movie tonight?” I asked. “I don’t know,” Ashley said. “Is it? I thought you picked out the movie last Friday?” “What movie did I pick out?” I asked. She shrugged. “I don’t know. I […]

Hearts Flying Freely: a short story

1.  I was watching a DVD one Sunday afternoon when Annabelle broke the news. “Hey, Lyle,” she said, walking into the room. “My mom just e-mailed me. We’re invited to dinner next Saturday.” “Oh, great,” I said, groaning. She frowned. “That was real nice. What did my parents ever do to you?” “Nothing,” I said. […]

The Do-Over: a short story

1. The cafeteria smelled like greasy french fries. It always did, no matter what was being served. Today, the menu featured sliced turkey with mashed potatoes and gravy. Jimmy shuddered. He approached the serving window, plastic tray in hand, and faced a tired-looking old lady wearing thick glasses and a tight hairnet. “Hi there,” Jimmy […]

Ode to a bygone love

I’m wondering where you are tonight. I’ll tell you where I am. I’m in a smelly cab traveling through downtown, surrounded by a city that’s blinding me with neon and swallowing me whole. I’m leaning against the blotchy, fog-coated window, which feels like a sheet of ice against my flushed face and fevered cheeks. The […]

A party of one isn’t much of a party

It’s inadvisable to go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day if you don’t have a date. Common sense, you say? A nugget of knowledge so blatantly obvious that it need not be spoken? Perhaps. But unfortunately, I speak from experience. Unattached and dateless — and working at a new job in a new town — […]

I scream, you scream — we scream at each other about ice cream

Earlier today, I went grocery shopping for my friend, Vanessa. As I carried the sacks into the apartment, setting them on the kitchen floor, Vanessa unloaded them and put things away. “Uh oh,” she said, as I carried the last bag inside, closing the door behind me. She was standing in the kitchen, the refrigerator […]

Getting what you want out of life 

I was having a bad day at work, so I decided to treat myself to lunch at a diner. The waitress came over to take my order. “Can I get you a drink?” she asked. “Sure,” I said. “Can I have a Coke?” “Pepsi OK?” she asked, chewing on gum. I sighed. “Yeah. Pepsi’s fine.” […]

‘Yes, dear’

Don’t throw garbage in there! That’s a decorative wastebasket

Roberta, I hope you’re having a good evening. Thank you so much for coming. I’ve been wanting to have you over to my apartment for quite a while. I also hope you enjoyed your dinner. Sorry I burned the fish sticks! I’m just not used to baking them in the oven. I usually use the […]

Sweet serenade in the moonlight

If you’re looking to serenade a special someone in the moonlight, it’s never advisable to bring a synthesizer. Trust me on this one. Even if it’s portable and uses four D batteries instead of an electrical cord, the hassle is sure to undermine your amorous intentions. First of all, you have the lug the oversized thing […]