Tag Archive | Personal

Learning invaluable lessons from an incompetent life coach 

It was around seven on Tuesday evening. My girlfriend, Ashley, and I had already eaten dinner. Now we were both sitting on the living-room couch, watching a Love It or List It rerun on TV. I was reclined with my head tilted back, and as the show played out, I started to snooze. It had […]

The abject inhumanity of a house without pizza 

It was a lazy Saturday afternoon. I was standing in the kitchen, rummaging through the pantry.  My girlfriend, Ashley, walked into the room. “What are you doing?” “Looking for something to eat,” I said, my head buried in the pantry as I waded through cans and boxes. Ashley snickered. “With your butt sticking out like […]

The erosion of quality in today’s ‘hurry-up-and-half-ass-it’ economy

A few years ago, I took a temp job as an entertainment blogger for an online magazine. My boss’s name was Ron. He was short with a clenched jaw and shoulders so stiff that they came up to his ears. Ron would spend his day walking up and down the rows of desks, screaming horrific […]

Not every question needs to be asked 

Years ago, before starting college, I worked as a laborer for a lawn-cutting service. We had five guys on the crew, including me, and my boss was named Crew Leader Carl. That wasn’t his legal name, in case you were wondering. That was just what we called him. (That would have been an uncanny coincidence […]

Falling asleep during the movie invalidates your perspective

It was Friday night. My girlfriend, Ashley, and I were lounging at home. “Is it my turn to pick out a movie tonight?” I asked. “I don’t know,” Ashley said. “Is it? I thought you picked out the movie last Friday?” “What movie did I pick out?” I asked. She shrugged. “I don’t know. I […]

Putting the pieces together 

It was Saturday evening, around eight. I was at my friend Ashley’s apartment. We were kneeling over the living-room coffee table, putting together a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle. We’d bought it about a week ago during a weekend shopping trip. Now, after working on it for a few hours every evening since, we were almost done. […]

Big-city sprawl is stealing small-town charm

I like living in a small town. There are so many quirks that you don’t get to enjoy anywhere else. Like the one time I went to a community theater to see a play. As everyone was settling into their seats, a man in a bathrobe walked in. I saw him and assumed he was […]

The future turned out to be as dull as the present

When I was a kid in the 1990s, I used to watch Back to the Future II — the one where Doc and Marty travel from the year 1985 to 2015. I remember how exciting it was then to dream about the future and all the technological advancements it would bring. Talk about a letdown. […]

When you’re less successful than an empty desk

It’s not exactly a confidence booster when somebody gets introduced to an empty desk and ignores you completely.  This happened to me years ago, and it’s happened to other people I know, too. I was working at my desk when a manager tromped in with a high-level executive. I had heard that she would be […]

Getting ahead by getting in over your head

“You know, you really should consider buying a house,” said my friend, Wayne, as he looked around my dismal apartment, his lips curled in a condescending sneer. “Now is a terrific time to buy.” “Really?” I said, settling across from him on my grungy couch. “Right now? You mean when inventory is depleted and prices […]